Monday, January 20, 2014

Life Size

Remember the movie Life Size with Tyra Banks and Lindsay Lohan before she went crazy? Apparently, they are make a sequel to the movie. In a recent interview Tyra Banks said, "I'm under contract with Disney and I can't talk about it at all, except that it's coming. But it will be very different, very different. Very modern - a modern take." I burst out laughing when I read "Very modern-a modern take."  Life Size came out in 2000! Sure, that was 14 years ago, but I still consider movies made during that time to be "modern." I felt super old reading that. How can you possibly modernize it? Maybe, make the cellphones all iPhones and update the wardrobe? It's all downhill from here. Im officially feeling old.
Apparently, when Im at school my friend and Mom hang out.
Mom: Hey Honey! I need to go do something, but here talk to Shannon for a bit.
Me: What? Why are you with Shannon?
Shannon: Hello?
Me: Why are you at my house?
Shannon: Well hello to you too!
Me: Answer the question.
Shannon: Im just helping her out.

I think Im going to like my sociology class.
Sociology Professor:We're using scented markers so you can get high off of those instead of regular, boring markers. If you're going to get high, you might as well do it right.

This is how my roommate spends her Friday nights.
Shandell: I want to go to a male strip club. Oh my god! Do you want to go to an adult store? Ive never been to one. Im looking up how to be a stripper. (5 minutes later) It says I have to get into shape. (tosses me a cookie) Looks like you and I cannot be strippers.

I overheard this lovely conversation before my A&P class.
Girl: Will you go out and drink with us?
Professor: Aren't you both minors?
Girl: So?
Professor: (laughs) So thats illegal.
Girl: What about when we are 21?
Professor: I'll think about it.

Shandell was getting ready to go out with her friend.
Destiny: (picks up thong from bin) Is this your headband?
Shandell: No, thats my thong.
Destiny: Lets pretend that didn't happen.

Scott and Lindsey decided to show up in my room drunk one night. 
Scott: We fixed your microwave!
Me: It was never broken….
Scott: Like I said, "We fixed it!"
Me: Of course you did.

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